MUSIC

“Life is one grand, sweet song, so start the music.” ~Ronald Reagan 

If that’s true, my “song” has been playing from the moment that I was born. 

Music has always been part of my life.  When I was just three years old, I corrected my mother on the lyrics to the song “Rainbow Connection.”  I said, “Its CONNECTION not collection!”  When I was in elementary school, MTV was in its prime.  It was 1985 and music videos were becoming more common place. Madonna was a hit-maker with songs like “Material Girl” and “Into the Groove”, Whitney Houston had just released her first album (self-titled), and Michael Jackson was already a Thriller of an entertainer. 

 Of course, since I was just a kid, I wasn’t allowed to watch that channel but I knew of these artists and their songs via the popular Disney Channel show, Kids Incorporated.  These kids weren’t “celebrities” but they had talent.  Sometimes, the lyrics were altered due to their age.  I LOVED it!  It was because of Kids Inc. that I learned what the hits of the time were without learning the “original” version.  The show aired from 1983-1993.  I watched every episode until the very end (though the last few seasons sucked) along with Disney’s “90s” version of The All-New Mickey Mouse Club.  I would watch current artists perform (The Jets, Tiffany, SWV, Toni Braxton, Exposé, etc.) without leaving my home.  It was great!

It was around late elementary school/early middle school that I got my first walk man.  It was love at first sight.  I could listen to the various radio stations that my parents didn’t want me to listen to (like 93.3 WFLZ), play my cassette tapes or record favorite songs from the radio onto a tape!  I couldn’t even tell you how many walk mans I wore out, how many radio tapes I made or how many headsets I would accidently break and need to replace. I’d listen to it falling asleep, first thing in the morning, during car-rides…it was my escape.  I could drift off and go into my fantasy world, pretending that I was performing those songs.  Listening to music was one of the few things I could do even up to the night I got my transplant.

 

April, 1995: with the Make-A-Wish lady. 

It was the Spring of 1996.  Bill Clinton was running for re-election for the highest position in the nation, Alanis Morrisette was still riding high from the success of her debut album, Jagged Little Pill, and a certain 16 year old (yes, yours truly) had just moved to St. Louis, Missouri to wait for her second chance at life.  Little did I know it, but I was about to meet a group of people who would help me throughout my transplant journey in ways no one could have predicted.  

Amanda A., Jennifer G., Chad H., Katie J., Katie K., Tim W., and Erik W.  These are the people who were either waiting for (the Katie’s, Amanda and Erik) or recovering from (Jennifer, Chad and Tim) their respective transplants around the same time as me at St. Louis Children’s Hospital.  Whether it was predestined or just sheer timing, I truly feel that I was meant to go through this particular phase of my life with these people for whatever reason.     

There are so many songs I could choose to describe that time in my life, my affection for the above people, and how much my encounter with them has meant so much over the years.  If I had to pick any song, the special one that brings a wistful smile to my lips and a small ache in my heart it would have to be the Carole King contemporary hit “Now and Forever” from the 1992 film, A League of Their Own.  

Now and Forever~ Carole King

We had a moment, just one moment
That will last beyond a dream, beyond a lifetime
We are the lucky ones
Some people never get to do all we got to do
Now and forever, I will always think of you

June, 1996.  Not even 10 days post-transplant and I already had my walk-man in my hands.  Screw germs, I needed my music! 

It may seem that I only choose songs that are poignant but in fact you couldn’t be further from the truth.  Case in point?  In a sickeningly twisted tribute to my donor family, a song that I would love to dedicate to them (if I had the “guts”) would be Kelly Clarkson’s “My Life Would Suck Without You.” 

I told you I have a quirky, off-beat sense of humor.  :-)

I don’t know when it happened but recently (within the last few months) something about that song struck me and in an odd way it seemed to make sense (lyrically) from a transplant-perspective.

My Life Would Suck Without You~ Kelly Clarkson

'Cause we belong together now, yeah
Forever united here somehow, yeah
You got a piece of me
And honestly,
My life (my life) would suck (would suck) without you

(Okay, so the lyric says “you got a piece of me” but just go with it.)

Since 2002, I’ve been an active participant in the U.S. Transplant Games. (I swear, one of these days I will write a blog post about the games!)  It’s because of these games I’ve made the most amazingly loyal group of friends.  They’re more than friends; they’re my “transplant family” who’ve got my back as much as I have theirs.  In addition, these games bring out my competitive side.  Of course, in the months leading up to the games I need that certain “gets me psyched” song; the tune that gives me that fire in my belly.  Out of ALL of the songs that I could choose, the one that recently reached my top spot, the one that gets me going has to be “Wide Open” by Sugarland. 

I don’t know if it’s the opening “oh ay oh ay oh…” being repeated or the immediate “stomp stomp” feel of the beat or what but there’s just something about that song that gets me so pumped!

Wide Open~ Sugarland

Oh ay oh ay oh
Oh ay oh ay oh

Every life has a moment where sweat meets fate
On your mark get ready get ready now
Gonna find out fast what a heart can take

Come in closer oh come feel the love on the inside
Electric current in my veins
Lets me know I'm alive
I burn I breathe I blink I.........

Wide wide wide wide open
And it’s a fine fine fine fine world
And this is my my life I'm hoping
Will be a fine fine fine fine world

Get ready get ready now (oh ay oh ay oh)
Get ready get ready now (oh ay oh ay oh)
Get ready get ready now (oh ay oh ay oh)
Get ready get ready GO (oh ay oh ay oh)

(FYI: I cut out some of the lyrics. :-))

 As you can see, I love music and always will. From Tag-Team’s “Whoomp! There It Is!” which immediately take me back to my last year of middle school, to Green Day’s “Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)” which was (appropriately) released when I was about to graduate high school songs are simply a way of life for me.  I've gone from using a tape player to a walk-man to a portable CD player to mini iPod to Classic iPod to (my current mode of music listening pleasure) iPod Touch! Don't ask me how many batteries I used before I got my iPod because I couldn't tell you!  That's how much of an impact music has made on me!  If I had to pick one song to define what I’ve been through and what I hope what awaits me in the future, it would have to be David Cook’s “Time of My Life.”

And I'll taste every moment
And live it out loud
I know this is the time
This is the time
To be more than a name
Or a face in the crowd
I know this is the time
This is the time of my life
Time of my life