Friday (12/31/10) the symptoms began: scratchy throat, stuffy nose. Uh oh....
Cold and flu season are upon us and for immunosuppressed people: this time of year makes us feel worse than the average Joe or Jane. The average Joe or Jane has the immune system to help fight off a cold. A transplant recipient doesn't have that luxury. We catch colds faster and it takes us longer to get said bug or virus or whatever out of our systems.
Tuesday, I left work early (about 2.5 hours) and came home. Yesterday I was ok but today? I'm feeling even more congested and groggy than the day before. NOT FUN!! Guess who had to call in sick this morning? I HATE calling in sick!! (But at least I know that two-three other people at the office who also have colds and flus and are either calling in sick or leaving early.)
Right now my nose is so stuffed up that I have to breathe with my mouth slightly open. My head feels groggy and when I try to clear my throat, you can tell I've got a lot of mucus in there. Sooo sexy (notice sarcasm).
While feeling all slug-ish this morning this topic entered my mind: when and if I find my Mr. Right, how will he handle it whenever I get sick? How will I want him to react? How will we both get through it together? (Alright, so these are a few questions rolled into one topic but it's along the same wave length.)
Now, most people that know me know that I'm not much of a whiner when I'm not feeling well. I stubbornly take care of myself, make my own soups, take whichever over-the-counter meds work best for me, etc. When a guy comes into the picture, will he do all of these things for me? Better yet, will I want him to? Will he know when to keep his distance and let me care for myself on my own, or will he hover over me where it drives me crazy? And after I'm better, will he go back to the way things were or will he suddenly be paranoid over my health?
Whew! I just realized I asked myself way too many questions! :-D
For those of you either in a relationship or married (and are a transplant recipient), how does your significant other handle it? Does he/she react in the way you like or do they secretly drive you bonkers? Do you have any suggestions for those of us who are independent in our healthcare?
(I might add more later...)
I am 13 years post transplant for cf. I met my husband after my transplant so he never saw me at my worst, with blue lips and an oxygen tank. I would like to say he handles things well, but quite honestly, when I am sick he freaks out. He doesn't know what to do or what to say. He tries to help by going to the store, but comes home with the wrong things. I have to reassure him that a cold isn't going to kill me, but I can tell it scares him. I guess the answer to your question is that he drives me bonkers, but I am still glad he brings me soup, even though it is the wrong kind.
ReplyDeleteThanks Jill! :-)
ReplyDeleteI 'm not a transplant recipient but when I am sick like you I want to be left alone.Let me sleep if I need something I will ask for it.My husband on the other hand is horrible when he is sick.he constantly whines and mopes drives me crazy.I guess it all depends on how sick i am .if its a cold leaveme alone.if its more serious my husband will call my sister (e.r. nurse ) and she usually takes care of me which I dont mind!
ReplyDeleteI think that partners of any person would just appreciate honesty (with a dose of your trademark sarcasm ;) before there is reason to witness an under-the-weather spell. A matter-of-fact, "It's nothing to worry about, but I seem to catch anything that is going around. Don't let it freak you out if you happen to see me covered in snot at a moment's notice,hahaha!"
ReplyDeleteMost men fear the unknown and just want to know what they can do to 'fix' a situation or control it. If Mr. Right knows off the bat that you, "just happen to catch alot of bugs but don't worry, I'll let you know if it's serious because I care about you and will always be honest with you," it could pre-empt his fear and build his confidence in YOUR confidence.
And if Mr. Right freaks out and can't handle it? He probably wasn't all that Right in the first place, and you deserve a partner that has enough personal confidence and strength to know that his wonderful Kim just happens to get the sniffles alot - and of course will wait on you hand-and-foot like a princess while you recover! ;)
Just my 2 cents!
I have had a transplant and my husband doesn't worry until I worry. He knows that I know when it is time to worry. He will go to the store and buy what I need and hug me when I ask but pretty much leaves me alone to deal with it.
ReplyDeleteWhen you find Mr. Right all of these things will fall into place and he will deal with it like anyone else that loves you deals with it. One day at a time.